Oh No...The Clock Is Ticking!

I just had a conversation with a lady friend of mine. Suffice to say, it's an interesting talk and all of us have our concerns about this issue.

Why is it so hard for a believer girl 25 years and above to find a partner?

So here's the dilemma:

1st approach
A 25-year-old lady looks for a potential partner in the church. Her criteria...must love God, must be able to lead her, must be financially stable, and all the other usual stuff. Well, preferably somebody from the leadership team right?

Unfortunately, most of the older guys in the leadership team are either already attached or have their own targets. The few ones that are left (countable with fingers)...what are the odds that both of you might have sparks of chemistry?

Let's move on to 2nd approach.

2nd approach
Since guys of 25 years and above in the leadership team are no longer applicable, perhaps younger guys in the leadership team can be considered. But what are the chances of getting a younger guy? As a 25-year-old lady, you're already earning your income and imagine you want to like a guy whose only worries are assignments and exams.

Plus, guys in the leadership team are always looking for spiritual and godly ladies. What do you do if you happen to be not spiritual enough for their taste? Or maybe you're not outstanding enough?

My friend, Clement Chee once said, "In order for a girl to attract spiritual and godly man, they first must be godly and spiritual themselves."

Let's move on to 3rd approach.

3rd approach
Since guys from the leadership team are totally struck off, now let's look another alternative: Non-leader guys.

As a girl, you want somebody who can lead you, somebody who has the spiritual/mental maturity. Non-leader guys...but what if they are not good enough? What if their commitment isn't in the things of God? Does the girl have to lower her standard so much just to get herself a companion?

This is truly tricky indeed.

As a girl, do you mind to get together with a guy who is not as spiritually high as you?

Let's talk about the last 4th approach.

4th approach
When all three previous approaches fail, what do you want to do? There are a few things you can do:

1. Continue to live a single life and secretly waits.
2. Pray to God that one day the Mr Right will finally come, believing for the best.

Then suddenly, some non-believer guys find you attractive. They are financially stabilized. They are everything they need on this planet earth, except for a life companion. They know how to make you feel special, how to make you feel wanted, and to provide for you.

Everything in them seems so right...the chemistry, the financial support from their support, their constant affection....

But then you have a problem...

He's a non-believer!

According to your circle of friends, they don't share the same core values as you do, and if you ever get together with them, there might be troubles in life later.

But, this man feels so right...

What do you do?

The ideal solution is: Pray till he believes.

But what if he doesn't?

I have another strange point to reveal:

At the age of 20-23 years old for a girl, isn't it strange that many guys come after the girl? Yet, they get picky and decide that many of them didn't manage to meet their criteria at all.

Not spiritual enough. Don't have enough leadership. Not financial established. Do not fit my dream guy criteria. Not good looking enough.

At the age of 25-30, if the girl is still single, she then wonders where all the good guys went.

It's hard for people to meet when if you only meet your CG members, zone and ministry members. Throughout my years, I happened to notice that sparks and electricity fly during big event season.

I heard of a couple who knew each other while working for a drama production, and they got together.

I heard of a couple who knew each other and worked with one another during Emerge conference, and they got together. In fact, I knew a lot of people who fell in love during Emerge season...haha.

I heard of another couple who got to know each better during Community Care project, and they became a couple.

People need a channel to work together. Without a channel, they cannot meet, they have no common topics to talk, they have no opportunities to get to know one another.

It's freaky if a guy suddenly walks up to a stranger girl on one fine weekend service and said, "Hi...I want to get to know you." She might probably think if this guy is weird or a stalker, or both.

But somehow, if the same guy gets to talk to the girl in a more safer channel, then the friendship can grow from there.

In my opinion, events/programs are the best channel. Interactions between both parties must be encouraged, there must be interactivity.

People must be able to notice each other and get the opportunity to talk to one another. From there, only can the journey of friendship move on!